Monday, May 1, 2006

Most beautiful people of 2006?

People’s Most Beautiful People of 2006 hit the stands this past Friday. But be warned, dear readers; to be able to find the beautiful ones, you need to arm yourself a magnifier and a lot of patience LOL. They are very few and very far between.

You have to wonder, are the people in charge of choosing these celebrities blind half-wits? Or is beauty really in the eye of the beholder—even if in this case, the beholder has the taste of a senile tranny..?



Trollop: Jessica Alba is definitely not the ugliest girl I’ve seen, but neither is she the prettiest—far from it actually. Her lips are too big and, I’m sorry, her hips look like those of a 12-year-old starving Somalian boy (yes, I agree in Sin City her bod looked great—a lot of creative editing I presume!). Also, her voice is just plain irritating; she talks like a 13-year-old pubescent girl. The BF lurrves her, but quite frankly, I can’t see what all the fuss is about.



Harlot: I’m sorry but I think Scarlett Johansson is overrated. I know FHM is a magazine for male moronic idiots, but how could they have possibly voted her as the “Sexiest Woman of the Year”? *gag* And over Angelina Jolie??? Seriously!

And why is everyone raving about her “talent” these days? Whenever she acts, her face lacks expression and emotion—you add this to an annoying tone of voice and you get the new “it” girl of Hollywood LOL. Granted she has big lips and a nice rack—real one, yes, we know this thanks to Uncle Isaac’s groping confirmation—still, she’s too dull, no personality at all, even BF thinks she’s blah (though he too likes Alba :/).



Trollop: James Blunt’s last shower was some time when Bill Clinton was still president. In the mean time, I think he’s been stealing old ladies underwear from Clotheslines (he looks like the sort LOL). We need to get this guy a hair cut and some soap—and prescription eyeglasses for those that think he’s hot!



Harlot: Angelina Jolie is incredibly beautiful and extremely sexy, even straight women find her attractive (have a huge crush on her myself LOL). She is, without a doubt, one of the most stunning women I’ve ever seen. And even now, almost ready to deliver a baby, she still looks like someone who graces the earth just to remind mere mortals like us, that only goddesses like her can have the Brad Pitts of the world.



Trollop: Patrick Dempsey is so hot, I almost wet my knickers every time I see him smile. I think he should have been in the cover of People’s for this issue. Maybe a picture of him naked and me biting that gorgeous tush of his. *g*



Harlot: The other day I was talking to a friend about George Clooney and how she thinks he’s too old. I said, “George is not old,” She then replied, “Yes he is. He’s getting old, you know. He’s not a god.”

First of all, men like George don’t get old, they get interesting. Yes, there’s the grayish hair and eyes that crinkle on the sides when he smiles roguishly, but I actually find those intensely sexy, just his gaze makes me sigh, *sigh* because I know this very charming man could ravish me three ways till Sunday, or four or five or ten!—probably till the next week! Oh my... *breathe* Er, where was I? Oh, yeah. Second, YES; George Clooney is a god. *g*

Labels: ,


15 comment(s):

Blogger Harlot said...

Oh HM, believe me i would LOVE to. I luuurve George. *sigh* LOL But that's the biggest blogger would allow. The pic's width is the same as the article already. Any size bigger, it will already pass the main borders. :S

Maybe next time i'll do George for our eye-candy. Let's see ;)

5/01/2006 01:45:00 PM  

Blogger Dinah said...

Thank you! I was beginning to think that I was the only one who was underwhelmed by Scarlett Johansson. I saw her in "Match Point" and almost wanted to leave as soon as she started talking.

5/01/2006 02:07:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey Bitches,
I really love your site. I discovered y'all a little while back and have been spending a lot of time at work simply "catching up." I don't really read a lot of romance novels for the most part because I read really fast, so my main goal lately is to find a book that will seriously slow me down. I think I might have to give this Bronze Horseman a try though. He sure did cause a lot of talk on your site. I did read a few of Nicholas Sparks books and although he may not have a lot of sex, he sure is romantic. Anyways, thanks for the site and I might have to join the club and get reading/commenting.
Thanks again,
hehesnort

5/01/2006 06:29:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I can't believe you didn't put pictures of Isaiah Washington up LOL. Oh man, that guy is so fuckable :P I'd have him over McDreamy/George Clooney anyday LOL.

I think Angelina Jolie is so sexy, I have a crush on her too :P

Naveen Andrew (Sayid in Lost) is also a big hottie for me. Love love love Rachel Bilson and Jessica Alba.

Not quite sure why April Lavigne and James Blunt are on the list either.

5/01/2006 06:30:00 PM  

Blogger Brenda said...

Had to come and check out Harlot's site - love it! Great first post for me to read.

5/01/2006 07:14:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hi hehesnort, welcome :D I hope you'll read TBH, it's a very well written book and if you love epic dramas with war stories, i think you'll love TBH.

Tart, i thought who the hell is Isaiah? Apparently, Dr Burke LOL He is hot but i don't think he can rival Clooney. *sigh* :P

5/01/2006 07:19:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Welcome Brenda, and thanks babe. :D Hope you visit often!

5/01/2006 07:20:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

How can you question Jessica Alba or Scarlett Johansson, when Kirstie Alley was part of the list?!?

LesboAnne

5/02/2006 01:10:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Well LesboAnne, it appears that the list is top secret lol b/c we couldn't find the whole thing! In any case point well taken.

Kristy Alley though beautiful once isn't looking her best at the moment lol

5/02/2006 01:53:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hey Anne :D

First, kudos to Kirstie Alley for losing all that weight.

Now, i too don't think she should be on that "TOP 100" list. The thing is, i know that many people would immediately agree with you and me about that, without even a blink. LOL However, with Alba and Johansson, many think it's PERFECT that they're both in the list. But as you can see, Trollop and i don't think so. :)

Hey, who else are in the list? LOL

5/02/2006 01:57:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sorry, I used to love Angelina, but I'm definitely on Team Anniston, and that just makes her look Fugly to me...Same with Brad Pitt, don't know if he's on that list, but I'll take George Clooney over him any day. Plus, I read that he has horrible hygiene habits...

5/02/2006 03:25:00 PM  

Blogger T-girl said...

oh, oh, oh, oh! I SO LOVE PATRICK DEMPSEY, and I have NO idea why! LOL Back in the day I thought he was HOT but I look at those old pics now and I think "why?" NOW I am in the same boat... I find him SOOOO hot and I am sure in 20 years i will look at the picts and say, "why?" But my God, the man is just sex on a stick to me, he is so HOT, I get excited just thinking about him, the hubby LOOOOVES GA night... although he has no idea WHY! LOL

5/05/2006 10:40:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

T-girl i too LOVE LOVE LOVE GA! Weeks ago i actually got crazy and almost killed my PC downloading GA episodes. You see, here only the 6th episode--of 1st season!!! I know! *sniff*

Since i couldn't wait and have to know what's happening, downloaded all episodes for 5 freaking days nons-top. :P But you know, it's worth it. LOL

Speaking of GA, i'll be doing a post about it soon. Maybe on Sunday or Monday. Glad you dropped by! :D

5/05/2006 10:48:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jolie is a beautiful woman. She’s not afraid to be different. Not afraid to paint her full lips red. Not afraid to adopt a BLACK baby girl or a Cambodian baby boy. Not afraid of speaking out against poverty and AIDS. Not afraid of using her Celebrity-dom to bring attention to important issues of children. She didn’t take anyone’s husband that wasn’t willing to go in the first place. She’s the anti-Jennifer. She loves her curves. She loves whoever lights a fire in her. She crosses boundaries. She loves herself. She doesn’t thrive on acceptance. She doesn’t live to be the thinnest, fake-blonde in Hollywood. She’s real. She's shaped like a woman not a little boy. She’s proud of raven locks. She speaks her mind.

5/08/2006 11:19:00 AM  

Blogger Chuck Darwin said...

i would turn gay for a night for george clooney.

angelina jolie makes almost any movie she's in watchable.

5/19/2006 10:02:00 PM