Monday, January 8, 2007

The Book Bitches interview with Sarah Brophy

Sarah, first, congratulations on your debut book Midnight Eyes. For those of you who don’t know, Sarah is none other than our lovely friend Tisty. :D On that note, how many names do you go by anyway? La Lohan? *gasp* Firecrotch???


Thanks for the congrats it’s a little exciting to be me at the moment. And Firecrotch??? Well, why, thank you! Just one of my many talents, genitals that burst into flame!!!!

Actually I’m not as named up as I say. I go by Tisty in webland because I was very shy when I first start surfing. It’s actually a mangled version of Tolstoy. Queer, I know, but it makes sense. Honest! My computer is called Mrs. Tolstoy after the real Mrs. Tolstoy, who is reputed to have re-written War and Peace 11 TIMES. (I haven’t even managed to get through it once!) So obviously every writer can do with a Mrs. Tolstoy in their life. However, I couldn’t use TOLSTOY as my cyber name because then I’d have sounded like a complete wanker. Not a cute male one
like you girls house or an enlightened BOB user, but a short-fat-man-comb-over wanker. Not a pretty sight!

So Sarah or Tisty will do just fine. Or Firecrotch. Growwwwl.


I like Firecrotch. Suits you really, eheheh. :P Anyway, yes, Midnight Eyes is getting great reviews I can’t wait to read it! (*hint* Am waiting for my free copy! *ahem*) Oooh, is that Rodrigo Santoro look-alike on the cover your BF?


Love the subtle hint, I almost didn’t spot it lurking there ;D.

And no, not Rodrigo Santoro, but a Fabio-esq model. Actually he’s getting some very interesting reactions. Non-romance readers (i.e. friends and family) all think he’s gorgeous while romance readers all seem to roll their eyes and complain that they have seen too much of him. It turns out he’s a complete cover slut and even has his own web sight. Sniff, and I though I was the one and only!!!


You mean he’s Romance’s town bike? But I haven’t even ridden—SEEN him! :/

Firecrotch, *ahem* tell us about your journey to publication. You’ve mentioned before that you’re dyslexic; surely that made it even more challenging. What were the highlights and stumbles along the way? And why did you decide to write Romance?



It’s not challenging, it’s complete and utter masochism. Whip me baby, I love it!

Seriously though, the whole can’t-spell-for-shit-thing might be a pain in the arse for a would-be writer, but the way I look at it is that it would always get in the way no matter what occupation I happen to choose. My Learning Disability (as they rather unattractively call it) is both language and memory based. That means I don’t know my b’s from my d’s, which is my left and my right, and where the fuck my house keys are!

It impacts on everything, so when I was deciding what I wanted to be when (or should that be if???) I grew up, I just didn’t factor it in. No matter what I choose it was going to be a little hard because of it, but if I wanted it badly enough I would just have to tough it out.

And that philosophy hasn’t led me to far astray. Basically I love telling stories and I’ll do what ever I have to do to get to the point where other people can understand them. The best way to understand the difficulties of a dyslexic writer is to compare it to someone writing outside of their native language. Tricky, but not impossible. Anything of mine you read is in translation. Sometimes a slightly dodgy one, admittedly.

I didn’t really choose Romance so much as it chose me. I’ve always read Historical Romances by the truck load and enjoyed them, but when I first went to write I poured out this terrible dark, maudlin, rubbish. It was awful, a complete mess. It was a Borat-like translation of what was going on in my head. I sent it away to publishers and agents and got really shitty responses. One publisher even suggesting I go back to school and learn how to write.

After a whiny depression of about 6 months where I irritated all my loved ones to the point of homicide, I went back to the drawing board and had a serious think about what the hell I was doing. That’s when I hit on the idea of Romance. It is a genre I love as a reader and it gave me the structure that my first book was so blatantly missing.

Of course, when I fist started trying to get someone interested in Midnight Eyes, I still got a lot of ‘what the fuck was that’ responses, but for some reason I had more confidence in it and was able to take it away each time and improve on it before trying again. Eventually the wonderful agent Kristin Lindstrom liked the story enough to sign me up and help with some of Midnight Eyes’... er... technical deficits.

So basically I’m now a very happy Romance writer, though I can’t wait till I have the money to build a heart shaped pool. Then I’ll know I’ve really arrived!


That reminds me of the heart-shaped vibrating beds in motels (seen them in movies, you pervs!). Ohhh, and you can pair it with a ceiling mirror—heart-shaped too, of course—on top of said bed! Tee-hee. :P Er, I swear I’ve only heard of these things from that kinky Trollop. Uh-hmm.

Besides being a published author and Firecrotch, do you have a “day job”? How do you balance your “day job” with writing books and partying La Lohan style?



Balance? You have got to be kidding! The day I achieve balance in my life I will have transmogrified and become special K!!!!

My day job (retail IT) is an ever growing monster that feeds on time, eating great chunks in a single bite. The few crumbs I manage to snatch back I waste on things like playing internet reverse, reading, watching DVD’s, farting around with hobbies like illuminated calligraphy, knitting and model ship building, participating in normal family life, amateur dramatics and day dreaming.

The smallest crumb of all goes to writing. As for partying, well *sniff* La Lohan has gone into some sort of suspended animation and doesn’t get out much.

Er, does my life now sound crap-boring or what!


What are you talking about? What could be boring in the life of a farting, knitting, drama queen writer? *g* Speaking of being a writer, the dread of all, from novelists to columnists to college students at exam time, is freaking writer’s block. I find stripping naked and dancing like a drunken nympho helps me LOL. What about you? What methods, or tricks, if you will, have you developed to overcome the blank stare at the blank page?


And this abandon dancing works? Mmmm, I might have to give it a try. But when I’m arrested, I’m blaming you in the press releases!

My method is the time honored ignore-deny model. I waste huge gobs of time doing anything but write. This lasts for about three weeks. Then I feel guilty and force myself to sit in front of my computer where I proceed to waste more time on cyber things. (God bless you Bitches. You have enlivened many a dull procrastinates!) This phase can last from any where between a week to my personal record of 8 months.

It’s after this I get serious and go and do the only thing proven to break this hell cycle: I go and confess my laziness to my mother. She sits me down and gives me one of her specially patented lectures. These suckers can last for hours, are never very pleasant but they always do the trick. She manages to strip away your every conceit and build up your confidence simultaneously. It’s an amazing feat and I can honestly say that if it weren’t for her I would not have more than three pages written!!!!!


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29 comment(s):

Blogger Jordis said...

Tisty, I didn't know you're an author! Congratulations on your debut book, Ms. Brophy. Or should we call you Firecrotch now? LOL :P

1/08/2007 04:30:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

8 months?!?!? Yikes that is one hell of a writers block!

Sarah, love your story, especially the borat traslation part LOL!!!

BTW, when you get enough money for the heart-shaped pool, don't forget to fly Harlot and I over for the inaguration! I'll bring the vodka; Harlot will bring the canned corn with cheese!

1/08/2007 04:31:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Oh, canned corn with cheese tastes good with vodka! Especially when you're frolicking in a heart-shaped pool. :P

1/08/2007 04:49:00 PM  

Blogger Petra said...

Love the heart-shaped pool idea and the heart-shaped bed and mirror too!

Sarah, what a great story. I mean, some people would just give up but you didn't. :) And yeah, I've seen that cover guy already, LOL. Still, he's a lot better than Fabio!

1/08/2007 05:00:00 PM  

Blogger Tisty said...

what I can have a heart shaped bed as well??? It never occured to me! I can see it now a heart shapped bed with pink satin sheets covered in itty bitty hearts. OHHHH I must have!!!

And does vodka go with raw pasta??? or M&M's

1/08/2007 05:10:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Tisty!!! Vodka and M&Ms definitely. Vodka and raw pasta... er, Trollop should answer that since she's the expert on scary weird stuff really. :/

1/08/2007 05:13:00 PM  

Blogger Isabella said...

Tisty, congrats on your first book. Must be so exciting!

Love your answers. :) (Should I start calling you Sarah now?)

1/08/2007 05:23:00 PM  

Blogger Jolie said...

Congrats Sarah on your first book. I didn't know you're an author, more so a dyslexic author. I must commend you on your efforts. I'm not dyslexic, only a poor speller but I complain if there's no spell check to furnish what I've written. Midnight Eyes looks good. :)

1/08/2007 05:40:00 PM  

Blogger Dakota Cassidy said...

Oh, congrats, Tisty!! How very exciting.

Hey, girls! I've been lurking, but sorta crazy busy. I miss hanging with ya :)

Dakota :)

1/08/2007 05:47:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hey Dakota! How are you and how's your holidays season? Did i tell ya, *sigh* i'm in love... *sigh*

1/08/2007 05:55:00 PM  

Blogger Dakota Cassidy said...

It was AWESOME. I had the best news like evah and a really relaxing time with R :)

I seeeeeee, miss. Tell me all about him. Like EVERYTHING :)

DC :)

1/08/2007 06:04:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Oh you can read about it below *blush* just scroll down a bit.

What great news? Come on, you can share with us. :D

1/08/2007 06:11:00 PM  

Blogger Polly King said...

Congrats, Tisty! That's wonderful, and love your answers. :)

1/08/2007 06:13:00 PM  

Blogger Dakota Cassidy said...

It's Tisty's day and she deserves KUDOS--but it's on my blog :)

Okay, so tell me, darlin'--is this like the kind of love that requires restraining orders???? Cuz he sure looks like someone FAMOUS. LOLLOL

DC :)

1/08/2007 06:14:00 PM  

Blogger Polly King said...

Hi Dakota. What great news? Everyone has great news. Harlot's in love, Tisty and her MIDNIGHT EYES, and now you. What about me?

1/08/2007 06:15:00 PM  

Blogger Dakota Cassidy said...

Hey, darlin'! I'm sure you have great news, sweetie.

Let's ponder this, yes? We'll create some good news--how's that? LOL

DC :)

1/08/2007 06:17:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Of course he loves me!!! He can't live without me really. Geesh, honestly.. Anyway, will read your news. :) Tisty, hope you don't mind a little bit of side gossip. Heh. :P

Don't forget guys, second part of interview tomorrow. I actually like that second part where Tisty confessed of wanting to be Britney Spears! I know!!!

1/08/2007 06:22:00 PM  

Blogger Danielle De Barbarac said...

Firecrotch? LOL! Congrats Tisty. :) I must say love the heart shaped pool idea and the bed with mirror.

About your cover, I also haven't seen this cover model so he's definitely new to me. I don't think he looks like Rodrigo Santoro though, who is a GOD, LOL, oh ok, maybe a bit...

Love your story Tisty. Great interview ladies.

1/08/2007 06:29:00 PM  

Blogger Danielle De Barbarac said...

Britney Spears? Tisty, I thought you're Firecrotch???

1/08/2007 06:30:00 PM  

Blogger Vanessa said...

Tisty!!! ((((hugs)))) Congratulations!!!! You deserve it. I hope you don't expect us all to call you Lady Tisty now... LMAO

1/08/2007 06:47:00 PM  

Blogger Tisty said...

gossip good, but only if it is naughty....and detailed!!!

1/08/2007 06:54:00 PM  

Blogger Petra said...

Tisty, just curious, are you planning of writing contemporaries? :)

1/08/2007 07:04:00 PM  

Blogger Tisty said...

No immediate plans for a contemperory Petra. For the moment I'm realy enjoying hanging out with dead people :D.

Maybe if I get more confident I'll have a shot at a comedy. the first book I wrote had a contemperory setting and it was soooooo aweful that I'm not keen to repeat the experiment!!!

1/08/2007 08:07:00 PM  

Blogger Lorelei said...

Congratulations Tisty. :) Wonderful news and lovely interview.

I like the idea that your name is a mangled version of Tolstoy especially when I once called you "Titsy" (by mistake), lol.

1/08/2007 08:08:00 PM  

Blogger ALE said...

Tisty, congratulations on your first book. That's awesome! I remember seeing a little something awhile back. You rock. I can't wait to read it!

1/08/2007 09:57:00 PM  

Blogger Dakota Cassidy said...

Oh, Harlot--whatever are we going to do with you? Darling--think STALKER. LMAO

Congrats on your release, Tisty!! Much sales and awesome luck :)

DC :)

1/08/2007 10:43:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

I have read Midnight Eyes and thought it was brilliant. Well done Tisty- you have done a great job. I hope there is another book in the pipeline!

1/09/2007 01:30:00 AM  

Blogger Aggie said...

Cool interview and book looks hot. Well done.
Don't forget a heart shaped spa pool as well.

1/09/2007 06:40:00 AM  

Anonymous Gun_Wielding_Bitch said...

I'm going to grab a copy just because it is Titsy. Congrats Titsy!

1/15/2007 10:34:00 PM