Friday, February 24, 2006

Boxers, briefs or commando?

Retro Bitches
Originally published on December 17, 2005

This is one of my all time favorite posts. Ladies, sit back and enjoy. *wink*


When it comes to men’s underwear, usually three** words cross our minds: boxers, briefs or commando?

Some women say that a guy’s underwear will disclose what kind of man he really is, but The Book Bitches will be honest and tell you that, whether a guy is wearing “tighty-whities,” “going commando” or “swinging loose,” it’s what’s inside that really matters. *g*

Here are some of our favorite heroes and what they like to wear (or not):



Joe Morelli and Stephanie Plum
Four to Score by Janet Evanovich

Morelli stood, scooped me up, carried me into his bedroom and dropped me onto his bed. He stripped off his T-shirt and shorts, all the while watching me with dilated eyes, all black pupil beneath the black fringe of his lashes. His hands were steady, but his breathing was ragged. And then his briefs were gone and he was naked.



Luc Martineau and Jane Alcott
See Jane Score by Rachel Gibson

She smiled against his belly and she would have bitten him if his skin hadn’t been tight as a drum. She unbuttoned his pants and shoved them down his hips and thighs. He stood before her, his black horseshoe disappearing beneath his white briefs. Then she pushed the underwear down his legs.



Kevin Tucker and Molly Summerville
This Heart of Mine by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

She heard him coming up the path, but unlike her, he wasn’t breathing hard. She shut her eyes. If she opened them, she’d just see what she already knew, that he’d stripped down to a pair of navy blue boxers before his first dive. It was painful to look at him—all those ripples, planes, and smooth long muscles. She’d been terrified—hopeful?—the boxers would come off in the dive, but he’d somehow managed to keep them on.



Bobby Tom Denton and Gracie Snow
Heaven, Texas by Susan Elizabeth Phillips

They’d even fixed the fly on his jeans so he couldn’t zip them up all the way. They fell open in a V that dipped so low he couldn’t wear his briefs under them. The jeans were also a size too tight, and he hoped like hell he didn’t get a hard-on because, if he did, the whole world was sure enough going to know about it.
“Gracie?”
“Yes?”
“I don’t have on any underwear.”
Her eyes shot up.
When he was on his feet, she slipped her fingers over the waistband of his jeans, where they had fallen open low on his hips, and discovered he hadn’t been teasing when he said he wasn’t wearing any briefs.



Ranger and Stephanie Plum
Ten Big Ones by Janet Evanovich

The ugly truth is, I’d finally lost the fight for dignity, and I was searching for Ranger’s underwear. Not that I was going to do anything kinky with it. I just wanted to see what he wore. Hell, I thought I’d shown a lot of restraint to have gone this long without snooping.
I’d now searched the entire dressing room, and unless Ranger kept his underwear in his safe, it appeared to me that he went commando.
I had one drawer left. I slowly opened the drawer and peeked inside. A single pair of black silk boxers. Just one pair. What the heck did that mean?
It was Ranger. The man was deadly sexy.
And he was walking around without underwear. I couldn’t stop thinking about it. I gave myself a mental face slap. Get a grip, I told myself. You don’t really know for sure. Just because you didn’t find any underwear, doesn’t mean he doesn’t own any. Maybe they were all in the laundry. All right, so this was a little improbable. I was going to go with it anyway, because the thought of standing next to Ranger when he was commando had me in a state.

**Unless:
a) You’re dating a stripper who wears thongs/g-strings (hopefully only for work purposes!).
b) You live in Europe or date a European who wears bikini briefs (and most probably also wears those tiny Speedo bathing suits to the beach LOL).

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37 comment(s):

Blogger Harlot said...

Trollop! Oh no! My BF didn't know i lend you his pic (for those who don't know: he's the last one on bed zipping up). Oh, he better not see this.. might get spanked again.. :S

12/17/2005 08:50:00 PM  

Blogger duotone said...

*uuuuuh* very nice guys!! I will show up again sometimes and look whats new :o)
greetings from germany!

12/17/2005 09:20:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

Wonder where Fredrik Ljungberg's (2nd pic) tattoo ends. mmmmm the possibilities *sigh*

Funny thing Harlot, that's actually a pic of your "bf" in my bed. Ooops, I guess I wasn't supposed to mention that?

12/17/2005 10:05:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

In my opinion, Ranger is sexier than Morelli.

12/17/2005 10:06:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

I like Morelli better, but after that Silk black boxers- commando quote, seriously re-thinking my position, lol!

12/17/2005 10:07:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

LOL Is this the result of too much booze from last night's party? That's his bed and i took that pic myself.

Hmm.. let's ask Matt.. (NOT Matt Farrell. The OTHER Matt.) You might be the one who's in dire need of another spanking. Add handcuffing too.

12/17/2005 10:13:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

who would think be cast as Morelli and Ranger if they make a movie out of Plum seires?

12/17/2005 10:16:00 PM  

Blogger Marg said...

I'm a cupcake kind of girl myself!!

But Ranger still sounds hot!

12/17/2005 11:17:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

I think Matthew McConaughey would make a good morelli, actually he would make a good anything, lol.

Ranger, I would have to give it more though. I know some people have mentioned Vin Diesel, but I don't much care for him. In the other hadn Raoul (last pic) could be my Ranger any day, lol

12/17/2005 11:17:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

eyes only Tks, we hope you come back often!

12/17/2005 11:18:00 PM  

Anonymous Ham said...

sorry for my akward english. As you already you know I'm not american. I'm korean and avid romance novel reader. .... Isn't it great? your bolg is quite international-! :-p ...... back to the very important task of who should be Morelli and ranger, Matthew McConaughey is too blondy but no objection! And I think Van diesel is perfect candidate for Ranger still afford to embrace any perfect dark, machoy hunk!

12/17/2005 11:41:00 PM  

Blogger King Of Hearts said...

Great Site! Keep it up
www.kingshuk05.blogspot.com

12/18/2005 01:16:00 PM  

Anonymous Serendipity said...

Vin D for Morelli? I think Vin needs to take lessons in elocution first.

12/18/2005 03:04:00 PM  

Anonymous Serendipity said...

ops...Vin for Ranger? I somehow pictured Ranger with a neck...which Vin seem to be missing. Don't get me wrong, I though Vin rocks in Tripple X

12/18/2005 03:06:00 PM  

Blogger My Mouth said...

I'm into all kinds of stuff, but boxers are my fave things to stuff in my mouth.

Great blog!

12/18/2005 10:20:00 PM  

Blogger Tart said...

My Mouth, you kinky dog! LOL

The casting of Morelli/Ranger has been something my friend P and I discuss ALL the time (okay, not ALL the time, but a lot LOL). And we still can't come to a decision.

Benjamin Bratt is one possibility for Ranger.

I have no trouble casting Lula or Grandma Mazur though (Queen Latifah and Cloris Leachman).

Now, as for the boxers/brief/commando question, I like my guy to wear the boxer briefs things. Much cooler and sexier that white jockeys!

12/18/2005 11:10:00 PM  

Anonymous Sasha said...

Harlot, you bitch...LOL (I can use the word in this instance). That CANNOT be your bf. Where on earth did you dig him up??? At the dungeon of the nun retreat you had to go to? ROFL

Btw, you know you live to be spanked for 'misdemeanors'...:p

2/24/2006 03:30:00 AM  

Anonymous Sasha said...

Btw, I used to be a boxers gal, but I guess I am impartial these days (probably from complete cluelessness and lack of action)...LOL. So these days I like them as long as the 'goods' are of the finest quality...ROFL. But 'Ranger' is definitely something :p

p/s: You guys are seriously corrupting my mind!

2/24/2006 03:33:00 AM  

Blogger Aggie said...

I'll take No. 1 and No. 5 to go - Thanks!
(Thats with, or without underwear, I don't care.)
Forward asap - post paid on delivery.

Is it OK to order more than one at a time?

2/24/2006 05:13:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hey Sasha,

Yes that's my BF. And yes, he's all mine (now him i don't share :P). LOL

BF's coming home tonight from Singapore, yay! But won't see him till tomorrow, sigh..

2/24/2006 05:23:00 AM  

Anonymous Sasha said...

Harlot,

I hope you don't mind, darling. I'm drooling all over your man...LOL.

Btw, have fun tomorrow!

2/24/2006 05:55:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Thank, Sasha. I will ;)
BF better be prepared. LOL :P

2/24/2006 07:46:00 AM  

Blogger Malicious Strumpet said...

Oh, I love you bitches. :) That was a lovely way to wake up this morning!

2/24/2006 12:40:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Harlot, you are one lucky Bitch lol

And muchos gracias for puting this up for us to enjoy. *Big huge smile*

I would lov to see more of this yumminess as romance heroes. Great way to display them!

VERY WELL-DONE!!!

Hotmama

2/24/2006 02:12:00 PM  

Anonymous Ehle said...

Just when I think I'm over it... Commando Ranger. Mmm. Nummy.

2/24/2006 02:49:00 PM  

Anonymous *star* said...

Hey Girls!!! I've been coming to your site for a little while now and I read in some other post that you were from differnet countries, but never in my wildest dreams crossed my mind that one of you is from my country the Dominican Republic and a fellow latin american too.

So, tell me, which one of you is and if you're living in the country right now.

Carolina.-

2/24/2006 06:41:00 PM  

Anonymous Vixen said...

Harlot, you bf is beautiful.
and I would be happy to take one for the team and be spanked in your place.
LOL

2/24/2006 08:47:00 PM  

Blogger Aggie said...

Can you clone him? Harlot? Please? Thanks ... *new best friend*

Are there any really good Websites to get a good look at photos of men in their underwear/nude - like a Victoria's Secret Closet, but of men? Please post us a list of sites if so, but... not ... porn of course!

where do u get those photos from?

2/24/2006 11:30:00 PM  

Blogger Isabel said...

Thanks for the eye candy. They are all yummy!

2/25/2006 01:03:00 AM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

Oh, Raoul my love!

Harlot, Raoul asks that you please stop harrasing him, and showing up in the middle of the night at his door with only a trench coat (you hussy!). He already has a trollop, tk you very much, and I tire him out as it is (no easy feat I can assure you, Raoul is Latin *wink*).

Star, yes one of us is from the DR *wink* E-mail us and we'll give you a hint, but we really can't say lol :P

I love that ranger quote :D Did I say that already? lol

2/25/2006 09:06:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Trollop,

This is what happens when you drink early in the morning babe.. :S And he is not Latino; he's Italian. :P

Raoul loves my "trench coat visits." I always have Nutella with me too. :P

2/25/2006 01:55:00 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Raoul is Italian??OOOh!

Tell me about Nutella???

Hotmama

2/25/2006 02:27:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hey Hotmama,

Yes he is. LOL I do love Italian men :P If i win the lottery LOL, i'll go travel, then will settle down in a charming villa in Tuscany and hire gorgeous oh-so-lickable Italian gardeners to tend my garden. I'll die happy. :D

Nutella? Well.. LOL All i can say is i consumed a jar tonight with BF. ;) LOL

2/25/2006 02:58:00 PM  

Blogger HOTMAMA said...

Harlot you are such a fucking riot!!!!lol
I swear,between all the bitches' banter and commntary, there is a fortune to be made someway, somehow:P for all of you..

About the Nutella.Never had it. Do you think its an italian food, you know,nutella--mozzarella....Isn't it hazelnut and cocoa/. and hazelnuts are italian nuts aren't they?
I hope to be eye-balling those gardeners in about a month ;)hope there's some drool-worthy ones too.

2/25/2006 10:52:00 PM  

Blogger Cinnamon said...

Hey, y'all. I'm reading Sex, Lies, and Online Dating by Rachel Gibson. Pg.68, "She wondered if he wore camo boxers or tighty whities. Maybe he went commando."

I just had to post this!

2/26/2006 12:01:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Hotmama, you've never had Nutella??? Err, somehow there's something wrong with that.. :S Btw, it is from Italy. :D

>>>I hope to be eye-balling those gardeners in about a month ;)
Gasp! You're going to Italy??? Oh, i'm so jealous.. *sniff* Can't i come? *sniff*


Hi Cinammon,
So is the book good? :D Rachel Gibson's last book, THE TROUBLE WITH VD, didn't like that one.. :S

2/26/2006 05:19:00 PM  

Blogger Sarah Jayne said...

For the love of all things beautiful - who is Man No. 1?????

Please...

3/14/2006 12:38:00 PM