BF is away for the weekend in one of the most exotically beautiful islands with the best beaches here in our country. He’s sleeping now after a day of paragliding and scuba diving. Yeah, without me. *sniff* Now, in addition to that, Trollop just left for a much needed weekend vacation. In a little while, she’ll be jet-skiing and dancing the hula. Uh-hmm, without me. *sniff* So you see, not only am I here alone without my BF, I don’t have my Trollop too! *weeping* The injustice!
You know... *blows my nose then sniffles* now that I think about it, they probably planned this together to punish/torture me. I mean, they both think I always do something wrong—even if, I swear, it’s not ALWAYS my fault! Sure it’s me who “attracts the freaks” and in some way “causes havoc” (Trollop’s words), but I never mean to cause any harm—really! And, well, yeah, yeah, I’m the one who killed the bunnies (BF’s gift), but I didn’t mean to. :/ Besides, we all know they died of natural causes anyway (I stand with my belief they were bitten by a poisonous evil bug!).
I don’t know why they do this to me. *sniff* If truth be told, I’m the best girlfriend to the both of them, those ungrateful meanies! Hmph! It’s not fair that even when they were just leaving, they both still thought I’ll do something bad when they’re not around. Look at how our conversations went (grr!):
Yesterday, before BF left...
BF: No wild parties while I’m away.
BF: Now tell me you’ll miss me.
Harlot: You’ll miss me. *g*
BF: (Er, too scandalous to be mentioned here. :P)
Harlot: Okay. *grinning like an idiot* I will, baby.
Today, before Trollop left...Trollop:
No wanker parties
I will. *innocent eyes*Trollop:
*looking at me suspiciously*Harlot:
I will, I will! Geesh.
See what I have to live with?! Tell me, which of my very OBEDIENT answers translate to trouble??? Seriously, I’m not the devil’s spawn here who despicably left to have fun WITHOUT ME! Grrr...
I know, I’m rambling LOL. *breathe* Alright, I better stop and do some work. I should finish all of them now; best not to have any distractions later while thinking of ways to make some people feel extremely guilty. Hmm, where’s that damn list again? Oh, there it is. Let’s see...
- Set up Karen Hawkin’s interview for this coming Monday.
- Set up BBC selection for June.
- Set up party for wanker.
- If asked, deny any knowledge of said party.
- If get caught, play innocent. (Must practice this, just in case.)
- If that didn’t work, blame it on the party goers, corruptors of innocent girls such as myself.
Wow, wanker is fast LOL. He really likes me, apparently. :P Anyway, since our lovely wanker is already here, listen up, you guys, and I want to make this very clear: BF and Trollop better not find out about this because, if I get in trouble, I swear I will take you all down with me!!! *angelic smile*
Good. Now that we’ve all agreed, what are you all waiting for? Pass around the tequila!