Tuesday, October 24, 2006

Story blook

And I thought blogging was only for ranting and the luscious eye candy.


Six years ago, a Japanese businessman went online to vent about his domineering wife. Blogging daily under the pen name “Kazuma,” he detailed how she grabbed food from his plate, sent him shopping in a typhoon, and made him sleep in the living room when he caught a cold.

Now, his terrifying spouse is famous as Oni-yome, or “demon wife,” the star of a book, a television drama, a comic-book serialization, a videogame and, coming soon, a movie.


Yet even after $300,000 in royalties, he’s still complaining! Men!

Okay, before I start ranting about men LOL, let’s go back to these blogs turned into books (often called “blooks”) that have been the trend for quite a while now. There’s even a Lulu Blooker Prize which awards cash prizes to blooks. Yep. Julie Powell, winner of the inaugural Blooker, was urged by her hubby to blog about her cooking triumphs, testing Julia Child’s 524 recipes in her kitchen (that deserves an award of its own!). Her blook, Julie and Julia, sold more than 100,000 copies. I know! Not that I could do that since I can’t fucking cook. This is more Trollop’s expertise, really. Come to think of it, since she always tortures me by giving me “helpful” and “easy” recipes she knows very well I can’t fucking make, and then blabbering endlessly about them (grrr!), this might not be such a bad idea... hmm...

Oh, yeah. There’s also Catherine Sanderson, who got sacked by her ding-dong company because of her blog, La Petite Anglaise. Penguin then signed her for two books; she got *gasp* around mid-six figures, a rich advance usually reserved for bestselling authors. Good grief! How come Trollop and I aren’t getting these golden deals?!? We could learn French! What? We could! Well, we’d try! Hmph!

Apparently, not everyone shares the same luck in blooking:


Others that arrived amid a wave of hype including Stephanie Klein’s Straight Up and Dirty and Jeremy Blachman’s Anonymous Lawyer haven’t fared as well.

Also on tap is a fresh wave of blog-based books from a waiter, a New York taxi driver, a pair of quilters and a wine connoisseur, and a handful of titles with political themes.


Hmm, if I were approached by one of these publishers, wonder what I’d write about... Flirting? Men? Sex? Most definitely there’s got to be something about sex and orgasm in it LOL. Oh well, if Maddox can do it, so can I. Surely the life of a harloty Book Bitch has to be more interesting than that of a waiter, driver, quilter or a wine connoisseur. :P

What about you guys? Does blooking appeal to you? Given the chance, what would your book, er, blook (this keeps reminding me of a fish!) be about? *g*

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18 comment(s):

Blogger Lollie Rose said...

Mid-six figures???? I've never even heard of this woman!

I wonder what are the criterias of these publishers regarding "blooks". I mean, is it decided upon the blog's traffic? How many visitors do it get a day and so on? Because there are blogs out there that gets a lot of visitors but the writing, OMG, is simply horrendous. Ack.

10/24/2006 11:00:00 AM  

Blogger Petra said...

Lollie, I agree with you about boring blogs with really horrible blogging style, and yet they still get a lot of visitors. I don't get it.

Anyway, if I were to write a blook, not that I could since I can't even update my own blog, LOL, I guess it will be about the struggles of a mother slash song writer. :)

10/24/2006 11:18:00 AM  

Blogger Nikky said...

book or blook... ever since I was a kid I wanted to write. I would LOVE to give up the midwestern wife life and make a 6 figure income!!
Subject however evades me. Probably something creepy, scare the hell out of you OR sleazy trollop having a good time type stuff.

10/24/2006 11:41:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Nikky,
Mi Trollop is sooooo far away from being sleazy, but she's the devil's seed, i tell ya!


Lollie,
I so agree about this: "blogs out there that gets a lot of visitors but the writing, OMG, is simply horrendous". One Singaporean blog always come to mind LOL.

I know my spelling is horrible and my grammar isn't perfect, but come on! I'm far from being an uber blogger LOL, but that Singaporean is terribly bad and she gets like 20,000 visitors per day??? WTF?!!

10/24/2006 12:41:00 PM  

Blogger Mailyn said...

LOL! That's just a weird idea. I mean, not that I'd turn the money down but meh, a blook doesn't sound like something I'd enjoy.

10/24/2006 01:36:00 PM  

Blogger Vanessa said...

I've never heard of any of these blooks... lol. But six-figure salary? My god, if someone offered me a six-figure salary to write a book, or blook, whatever, hotdamn I'll write anything he/she want me to! :P

10/24/2006 01:50:00 PM  

Blogger C Bradshaw said...

I've heard of Julie and Julia from a friend and she said she liked it. I've yet to read it though.

I wonder how long will this trend last. Personally, I don't think these blooks are interesting at all. Of course if it was me who got a book deal, to hell with everyone. Even if it's a sexual memoir, no way I'll be saying no to that! LOL

10/24/2006 02:32:00 PM  

Blogger HOTMAMA said...

Harlot, ever since I found yours and Trollop's fab Blog, I've thought that there should be some way for you two to profit from it. Now you have it! Pick your best articles and submit for publishing in a compilation of Best of the Book Bitches. And don't tell me they're not good enough....they are!!

10/24/2006 02:37:00 PM  

Blogger Lorelei said...

Harlot, I agree with Hotmama. You and Trollop should compile your great articles and submit them to publishers! :D

About blooks, I've never read one. The ones mentioned above, a blook about cooking and a French nanny? I don't know how that could be interesting for me. If I were to write one though, it would probably be boring. LOL! Well, I'm not a writer. I like photography though. Hey, this could work. They have books about that! :P

10/24/2006 03:52:00 PM  

Blogger Ladybug said...

My sister in law gave me a copy of Julie and Julia. Trust me it's not all about cooking. Actually if you're expecting this book to be all about Julia Child, skip it. I think Julie has a lot of potential but she's not a good writer. I don't know if it's just me but even if Julie's talking about Julia's recipes, it seems like she's not even interested in the food itself.

10/24/2006 04:28:00 PM  

Blogger Danielle De Barbarac said...

I've never heard of these authors either but good for them to get a book deal because of their blogs. I don't understand though how a new author would get a six figure contract when she hasn't even written the book yet. That's just way too much if you ask me.

10/24/2006 07:20:00 PM  

Blogger Jolie said...

Harlot, I think I know that Singaporean blog you're talking about and I quite agree. She speaks bad English (I'm sorry but she does, terribly so) not that it should be seen as a way to look down on her. I'm just saying I don't understand why she has a lot of visitors when she is neither funny, entertaining, nor a good writer. And she thinks she's a goddess and a hoot! Please, she's not funny at all!

10/24/2006 07:32:00 PM  

Blogger Danielle De Barbarac said...

Jolie LOL! Now I wonder who's the Singaporean you guys are talking about.

10/24/2006 07:39:00 PM  

Blogger Jolie said...

Oh god, Danielle, trust me, you're better off not seeing her blog.

10/24/2006 07:47:00 PM  

Blogger Lily Moon said...

Blooking? LOL! That's a funny word. :P If I were to write my own blook, it would be about a college student who can't stand a certain professor she's been wanting to poison ever since she laid eyes on him. Tell me girls, would anyone pay to read that?

10/24/2006 08:49:00 PM  

Blogger Aggie said...

Lily Moon: Yep - but only if you do it. Don't forget to choose an untraceable poison. LOL!

Yep - I'm all for The Harlot & Trollop Chronicles. Better than Bridget Jones I reckon!

Books about recipes - bletch! Well, maybe if they are SEX recipes. Why don't we all submit a sex recipe each to Harlot & Trollop to put together a blook and we'll all make money. LOL!

10/25/2006 01:13:00 AM  

Blogger Jordis said...

I'm up for The Harlot and Trollop Chronicles. That's a good title too! ;)

Lily, don't listen to Aggie, she's a bad influence! LOL Patience, my dear, patience. Though if that doesn't work, I agree with with the untaceable poison...

I don't like to cook either. I love watching cooking shows however. Would reading a book about cooking be the same? LOL Most of the blogs I see are "Diary of X" "Musings of Y" "Bridget Jones Wannabe This" "Bridget Jones Wannabe That". Most often than not, I find those blogs boring. No way I'll be spending money to get the book if I won't even bother reading the blog.

10/25/2006 04:06:00 AM  

Blogger are you asking me to dance? said...

Interesting topic! The only blog (of sorts*) turned book I've come across is the Chronicles of the $700 Pony (which, incidentally, I just found out was released today).

*It's not so much a blog as a horse BB: http://chronicleforums.com. The author posted anecdotes of her adventures with the $700 pony and I guess someone liked it enough to turn it into an actual book (I don't think it was a huge book deal, though). The old threads are still available in the Favorites/Archives.

I'll probably end up buying this one because, well, horses! and by someone who knows something about horses (double yay!). And the stuff I've read (in the favorites) has been very amusing.

My life/blog isn't interesting enough to be turned into anything other people would want to read.

10/25/2006 08:16:00 PM