Wednesday, February 13, 2008

You'd be the last what standing?

This past weekend, I stumbled across an E! “reality” show sponsored by Marie Claire magazine called The Last Model Standing.

I can’t seem to find much about it in Google, which makes me think it wasn’t a raving success and yet, I enjoyed it. It was mindless and fun and short (the whole thing happened in one episode; it was great—no milking-it-for-all-it’s-worth like those reality TV shows usually do).

This is the premise for the show:

Seven aspiring models endure a battle of the body and mind as they compete for a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to jump-start their careers with a layout in Marie Claire magazine.

Now, you think the enduring battle of the body and mind thing was a ploy? Well, it wasn’t. To me they went through one of the worst things I could imagine being willingly subjected to. They had to stand for hours (the last two made it to around 40 hours) with at least one hand on a huge spread of Marie Claire, in high heels and makeup, in the cold evening and under the blazing sun. Sometimes in bikinis, other times in skimpy tight outfits and, in the end, in dresses. Some of the tasks included posing with snakes and balancing martini glasses in top hats. All this sleep deprived, in heels and with one bloody hand in that mag spread.

I kept wondering why anyone would subject themselves to such torture to appear in a freaking magazine. I’d have thrown in the towel after the first hour of blazing sun in high-heels LOL.

So I wondered: What prize would provide me with the resolution to be the last person standing in a similar competition?

I couldn’t come up with much. I have no interest in being famous, no one would be willing to give me the—at least—5 million dollars it would take for me to go through 40 hours of sleep depravation standing in mules; no contest would offer me the presidency to a country. In general, I came out blank. Except, I pondered, for an opportunity to participate in Extreme Makeover. For that, I’d spend a month standing beside that damn magazine cover—or a huge scalpel in this case LOL. Yes, I too am surprised by my shallowness.

What about you guys? What prize would have you entering a similar contest and doing your very best to beat everyone else for that one thing you covet above all others?

Please, no cutsie end-world-hunger-and-eternal-peace answers! It has to be a price you know a program would award you, but it can’t be cash. And no castles, Harlot, because no one would give you your very own castle for standing with your hand on a Marie Claire cover, hmmphh.

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10 comment(s):

Anonymous kim said...

Well ending world hunger or eternal peace...FINE then dammit (shakes head sadly) I guess I will just have to settle for a weekend retreat with the French National rugby team. Dang. The sacrifices I make...

2/13/2008 02:43:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Extreme Makeover? Pft. I'd do it for Amazing Race though. Oh the traveling around the world while playing games while flirting with the other cute boy contestants... *sigh* Anyway, that's not my answer since you only have to send an audition tape to join Amazing Race and not do some stupid touching the magazine stunt.

Okay, what prize.. hmm.. Wonder if some verra handsome, verra exciting, verra rich prince would do a show like The Bachelor? I will stand for as long as it takes, touching whatever they want if the prize is the prince marrying me and loving me crazy forever and ever. I will have castles (it's valid since i didn't asked for it directly hmph!), subjects, and all that princessly privilege, not to mention after some time, i'll officially be Queen Harlot. :D

2/13/2008 03:36:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

RE: Wonder if some verra handsome, verra exciting, verra rich prince would do a show like The Bachelor?

That IS NOT VALID. They would not raffle a person to marry in a contest.

And, anyway, didn't the bachelor have some italian prince or whatever that turned out to be a jerk? And I don't even think he had a castle!

Kim, Really? You'd do it for sex?!?!! I'd never have sex for the rest of my life if it requiered standing, sleep deprived in high heels, for 40 hours.

Forget sex, my fingers work just fine! LOL

2/13/2008 03:42:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

It is so valid! Didn't they marry some rich guy in a contest before? He was looking for a wife, i swear i heard something like that.

No idea about The Bachelor, don't watch it; didn't know they had a prince bachelor.. But what good is he if doesn't have a castle? :/ Maybe you're talking about that Joe Millionaire dude. I swear, ugliest man in all of the giving-away-free-fiance contests. Blech.

In any case, MY prince is not going to be a jerk! He'll be smart and funny and charming and he will definitely give me pretty castles including my very own villa in Italy.

2/13/2008 03:55:00 PM  

Anonymous karamia said...

Hmm. Okay, I want a boob lift (2 kids! ;), a HUGE shopping spree at Nordstrom's (including online) that I can spread out over the 4 seasons, a stocked wine cellar (well stocked), and a cruise around the world. Too much? And could they throw in 50grand for a kitchen remodel?

I would easily make it through whatever they threw at me for all that. Spending a few days in high heels in rain, cold, and heat? no problem.

2/13/2008 04:15:00 PM  

Blogger Jordis Juice said...

God, this reminds me of the show The Swan. I so wanted to be in that show! I want to be the Last Swan Standing. LOL! I wonder how much they paid for each of the contestants.

I can't imagine I can last for 40 hours without sleep - and standing in heels. I know many models don't eat but c'mon...

2/14/2008 12:00:00 AM  

Blogger Jordis Juice said...

"And, anyway, didn't the bachelor have some italian prince or whatever that turned out to be a jerk? And I don't even think he had a castle!"

I am ashamed to say this but I saw that! Here he is:

2/14/2008 12:06:00 AM  

Blogger Jordis Juice said...

Lorenzo Borghese (born June 9, 1973), commonly known as Prince Lorenzo Borghese, is a member of an Italian noble family, a cosmetics entrepreneur, and stars on the 9th season of ABC’s The Bachelor American television show.

Borghese was born in Milan into the noble Borghese Family, the son of Francesco Marco Luigi Costanzo Borghese (born 1938), and his American wife, Amanda Leigh. His mother's stepfather was Douglas Leigh, the sign and lighting designer. Lorenzo Borghese's paternal grandmother was Marcella Borghese, who founded the Borghese cosmetics line in 1958; it was a subsidiary of Revlon.

2/14/2008 12:09:00 AM  

Blogger Frozen Star said...

Lorenzo Borghese is a bogus prince, because Italy is a republic. Wouldn't kick him out of bed though...

Anyway, I have no problem with staying up for 40 hours, but I'm strictly a sneakers girl, so... Can't think of any prize, except perhaps an obscene amount of money, that's good enough for me to consider it. Hmm, actually, I'd love a book deal, but I don't think I would want to get it by way of sleep deprivation and torture by killer heels...

2/14/2008 09:32:00 AM  

Blogger Petra said...

I, too, would do it for Extreme Makeover. Or even for a super apartment in any of my favorite cities in the world. The problem is the doing it part. Standing for all that hours without sleep and in heels will kill me and my rheumatic legs.

2/14/2008 04:19:00 PM