Tuesday, December 6, 2005

Harlot's best and worst

Okay, I’ve been waiting a long time for my fellow Book Bitches to pass me their best and worst reads. Apparently, they are either: swinging in the jungle, busy shopping for granny support hoses, or just too lazy to do anything but have sex to answer my request. *pout* Since we’ll soon be doing our “Best of 2005” list (keep checking the site, people!), I decided to go ahead and post mine without them, hmph. (They better follow!)

Here are my top three favorite books, which are, of course, very highly recommended:

The Bronze Horseman by Paullina Simons. No other book has ever touched me like this book did. EVER. The love, the war, Lazarevo... *sigh* Tatiana and her Alexander’s love for each other is so overwhelming, so incredibly intense that you cannot help but feel their anguish, their adversity, their every passionate thought and pleasurable sensation. I’ll try to explain it this way: TBH is like a drug that generates a drumbeat—pounding and pounding and pounding, until it feels like you can’t breathe and your soul and your heart will burst! Oh my, unbelievably good.

Gone with the Wind by Margaret Mitchell. Rhett Butler. Scarlett O’Hara. Do I really need to say more?

Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban by J.K. Rowling. A paramount gift to the literary world, the HP series is beyond astounding. Each book is as important as the others, but book 3 is my favorite yet. It certainly is the most intriguing: not one word lost, not one idea without great significance, incredible twists and turns are added, as JKR deepens Harry’s background, delves more into the world of Hogwarts, and introduces new characters who factor into the past and future events.

Now, let’s move on to the “what horrendous crime have I committed to deserve to read such rampant stupidity?” which I recommend to people whom I want to see suffer:

Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. S-H-U-D-D-E-R. Iiick!!!

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy. You can call me unrefined and say I’m lacking in literary sophistication, but I find this “great classic” HORRIBLE. Anna is detestable, she doesn’t evoke even the tiniest bit of compassion (actually, quite the contrary as I spend half the book thinking up creative and fun ways in which she should DIE!). As the book progresses, it gets to the point where it’s almost physically painful to continue reading, each chapter worse than the last (no small feat, I can assure you!). I honestly think even Tolstoy himself got bored of Anna that’s why he threw her in the path of a train (gotta give it to the author for doing the world a favor and delivering a very creative “die you useless bitch!” scene LOL).

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9 comment(s):

Anonymous Tart said...

Interesting list - I actually like two of the books on your hate list LOL. (Of course, I do. I'm a contrary bitch! LOL).

Support hose have been purchased my dear...but I'll only wear them at night! Crap, I'll never get any sex now with these things on my legs *sob*.

I have been working on my list - I'll post it shortly.

12/07/2005 12:15:00 AM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

> I actually like two of the books on your hate list.

Tart, there ARE only two books on her HATE list, lol.

12/07/2005 12:40:00 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said...


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Thanks for the book suggestions.


12/07/2005 03:16:00 AM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Tart, you once wore 80's vests (i saw the pic LOL :P) and still had a lot of fantastic sex. I doubt a flimsy support hose will stop your bf. He might even find it uncommomly kinky to take them off of you by his teeth. ;P

Trollop, you vicious bitch! FYI, i cut it to only 5 books since it would be too long. Why don't you post your list instead, hmp.

12/07/2005 05:49:00 AM  

Anonymous Tart said...

Trollop LOL, I noticed as soon as I posted the comment that there were only two books on the don't like list..duh. This swelling of the feet is obviously moving north to the brain. Hmph.

12/07/2005 06:19:00 AM  

Anonymous Tart said...

Harlot, I can't believe you're bringing up the fact that I wore hideous clothes in the 80s LOL. I want to fool people into thinking I was always stylish LOL, and that includes the nana support hose, which I am wearing now. Grrrr....sexy LOL.

12/07/2005 06:22:00 AM  

Blogger Serendipity said...

Harlot, Harlot, Harlot!

I cannot believe you dislike OUTLANDER. It just goes to show you never read it! I just don't know if you can disklike it after reading the intirety of the book.

Hmpf! If I send you a caseful of Nutella, would you read that damn book then?

Come on, Harlot...keep an open mind. Really!

12/07/2005 02:10:00 PM  

Blogger Vicious Trollop said...

I read not only Outlander, but Dragonfly in amber too, and ICKKKK is nothing compared to what I think. lol

12/07/2005 03:50:00 PM  

Blogger Harlot said...

Geez, of course i read it! I did skipped some pages though since i jsut couldn't stand. Don't tell Trollop, i actually have 2 copies of this book (ack!) as i thought i lost my first one and since i promised you i'd look into it, i bought another one. :S

P.S. A caseful of Nutella..? I'm drooling here. LOL

12/08/2005 05:10:00 AM